Some couples were just made for the lifestyle. The BBC-loving HotBrunetteWife and her husband are one of those couples. You’ll see why as you read this interview.
I don’t want to give too much away, but it really realistically portrays what it’s like to try to balance the lifestyle with “real life”. Anyone who is considering getting into the lifestyle will benefit from reading this, and anyone who’s already in it will find a lot of this ringing true.
Without further adieu, allow me to introduce HotBrunetteWife!
Q: How did you get started in the hotwifing lifestyle? (whose idea was it, how did the topic come up, when, how did it all progress to this, etc)
A: I guess you could call it a perfect combination of naughty minds and behaviors: I’d always had trouble staying faithful in relationships, as had my husband. We clicked sexually straight away when we met though so very early in our relationship we had open conversations about sex and our sex life moving forward. Both of us acknowledged that we could never be with just one person sexually for the rest of our lives, and he told me about swinging and introduced me to that, which I’d known nothing about before, and honestly I still struggle with all the ’lifestyle terminology’. Once we were involved in that I told him about my sexual desire for black men, as I’d been doing that secretly for a few years cheating with them behind previous boyfriend’s backs, and it was my turn to introduce him to something new. Luckily for me he was almost as turned on watching me as I was doing it and said it was like having his own private pornstar, plus I am more jealous than he is and find it hard watching him with other women, so we naturally progressed into primarily being a hotwife couple mostly.
Q: You mentioned you’ve been playing for awhile but were finally convinced to start posting content. What were your reservations about posting your content? What helped you get over them? Do you regret your decision?
A: Like I said I’m not really au fait with all the lifestyle side of things, that’s more hubby’s domain. Even now doing this I’m just a woman with a high sex drive who loves being a bad girl in secret, he really guides me through the lifestyle side of things. So for me it was always just something I did in secret and was taboo; I come from a very straight laced family so even talking about sex is not something that people did, let alone sex outside of marriage, multiple partners and all the other stuff. So even though I was already a bad girl in secret, putting it out there online was a whole other step and my biggest concern is my family finding out about it I guess. We already enjoyed filming our play sessions for our own enjoyment anyway. I was encouraged by numerous people to create an Only Fans page and the fact that I could do it and keep my face concealed but people would still want to see it helped. I was getting back into playing after kids and needed something to push me - it’s been a huge confidence boost and really driven me to play more than ever, and I’m having so much fun and getting pleasure doing it. So far no regrets although it is a lot of work alongside a full time career and raising a young family, plus we already had a busy social life; and I’m already finding you have to focus on the positives and not the negatives otherwise it would be easy to get discouraged and stop.
Q: You’re a mom–scratch that–a MILF. What challenges have you ran into regarding keeping your secret double life private from your kids/friends/family? What precautions do you take to ensure your secret can stay a secret?
A: Really it’s mostly just doing my best to keep my face and personal information private, we spend a lot of time on editing and it can be frustratingly slow and difficult but it’s worth it to protect my kids, and not have to deal with family difficulties. Luckily my kids are very young so it’s not really an issue with them right now and for a few years at least; and honestly I’ll probably stop, at least with the content creating, by the time they get old enough it might become an issue for them. My family will always come first and I’m only this because it’s fun, not as a career or anything like that. I always interact with my fans but when people get too pushy or ask too much I cut it off for that reason.
Q: As best you can, how would you describe the appeal of BBC over BWC? What draws you to the interracial element of it all?
A: For me it’s a combination of a couple of factors. One is definitely the subconscious taboo aspect of it coming from a conservative family. Then honestly it’s just a sexual thing I can’t really put into words other than to say that my body reacts differently and I get much more turned on by a BBC than a BWC, the skin contrast is a turn on, the way we look together, and the dynamic between me and a black guy I find different to a white guy, and something that pushes my buttons more. In terms of the lifestyle side of it, I get good sex at home from my husband with his white cock so being a QOS gives me something I don’t get at home, so there’s no need or desire on either of our parts for me to fuck other white men.
Q: You made a post saying you took the condom off the bull who was inside you even though you were ovulating. How big a part of you would actually want to get pregnant by someone else? How does your husband feel about this?
A: Honestly it’s really more the fact that I just prefer sex without condoms than anything else so if I’m with a trusted partner and we know we’re both tested then I’m always going to try to get rid of that condom. During sex the pregnancy risk is a turn on for all of us, but in reality I’m not trying to make that happen. For one we’re likely done having children, and secondly people’s real lives are involved, especially the child, so for me at least it’s best kept a fantasy.
Q: One of the biggest challenges for couples in the lifestyle is finding good, real, respectful, third parties to play with. How do you go about finding others in a safe, effective way? What sites do you use?
A: Oh absolutely, while we’ve generally had good luck with playmates, there have been plenty of fakes and flakes along the way, and I have also had a couple of bad experiences in person as well with guys turning out not to be very nice. I generally let my husband take care of the logistics and actually setting up things, with the odd exception. He does a good job of vetting the guys we meet, and I always insist on him being there for the first meeting for safety, just in case. Plus we get better content with him filming so he doubles as cameraman and security lol! We generally prefer swinger sites with paid membership and verification like SLS; but we’ve found guys elsewhere and now that I’m doing the Only Fans thing I’m finding I’m getting trustworthy guys who also produce content reaching out to meet so that has helped.
Q: What keeps you from falling in love with one of your bulls?
A: I have to admit I do like when there’s a connection and some kind of intimacy/feelings with a guy I’m having sex with as it makes it more intense, but I know my husband is my one and so even if there are some feelings that develop it is easy to keep compartmentalized as it will never compare with what I have with him. After all we have so much more than just the sexual side of things in common.
Q: How hard (or easy) has it been for you to make money on onlyfans? Did you two start sharing your pics online with the intention to make money from doing so, or is making money only something you got into when you found out it was possible via onlyfans?
A: We started sharing initially just for fun, little bits here and there on other sites, and it was only after repeated requests from numerous people to start a page and hearing from a couple of other content creators about the earning potential that I decided to take that step. The main reasons I decided to go for it - I was finally getting my confidence and sex drive back properly after the kids and wanted to start playing more; but it costs a lot of money to be active in the lifestyle for a hotwife: from hair, nails, waxing etc. etc. to outfits, paying for hotels and for babysitters it adds up to a lot of expense for each time I meet with guys. With a young family that’s a luxury we just couldn’t afford with the frequency I wanted to play. So I figured if I could just make enough money with an Only Fans to cover my lifestyle expenses then at least I could have some fun and not take away from my family finances. Also finding the time with kids is hard and I felt like if I was forced to play on a regular basis because I need to make content for my page then it would help me to prioritize that me time instead of always finding a family excuse not to.
In terms of how hard/easy has it been - well the first month was amazing and definitely exceeded our goals and expectations; steadily building a fan base every day and creating content on a regular basis, that everyone seemed to be loving. I think we may have been spoilt by that though as the second month has been a struggle; despite all the positive feedback and the fact I know I’m posting good stuff it’s been difficult to even maintain the number of fans I had at the end of that first month, let alone continue building the base. I guess a lot of people are into just checking out different creators for a month and it’s hard to continue building without having a wider social media reach, since people can only find my page if they see my twitter posts etc, and I guess that just takes time, and regular activity. I won’t lie and say I don’t take it personally when people don’t resubscribe, but I try not to compare myself with where other creators are too much since I only just started out, and I’m doing what my primary goals were; namely having way more sex meets and covering my expenses so I can’t complain. And I have some great loyal fans who really give me great encouragement to continue.
Q: How do you balance being a mom, a wife, a hotwife, and whatever other roles you have to play in your real life with how demanding life is / can be for women nowadays?
A: That’s probably the hardest bit. I have two under 4s, a large extended family and big social circle in my regular life, in addition to which I’m a full time nurse so finding time not just to actually do the lifestyle fun but then also then turn it into content and maintain my page is very hard, especially when nobody in my day to day world knows about my secret hotwife life. Luckily my husband helps out a lot! He edits all my video footage and creates my media for me, which is massively time consuming, and he does that alongside his regular job and looking after the littles as well so I definitely couldn’t do it without him! That way I can just choose what to post and have a bit of time to interact with my fans. I also try to make it clear that I am all of those things and not a younger hotwife with no kids and no other job, so people don’t expect me to post as much or as often as those girls can. I try to just make sure what I do post is quality and worth the wait!
Q: This lifestyle seems like it has certainly enriched your life and relationship. If you were asked by other women what the appeal is and why they should consider it, what would you say?
A: As I touched upon above with how we got started in the lifestyle, it has been amazing for us. Our sex life but also our relationship overall is so much better because we are open with each other. We talk about and allow each other to live out our fantasies and our best lives. I feel like I am a much better and sexier version of myself because of my involvement in the lifestyle and in turn my husband finds me so much more attractive and desirable. I feel like if we weren’t doing this we would both be unsatisfied and unhappy; and I could never be in a relationship like that again.
Q: What are your primary relationship goals and your hotwife journey goals?
A: I guess I’ve probably covered this already but really to just keep our relationship fun and vibrant even as we get older and have been together longer. I would like to live out as many hotwife fantasies as possible and just create content people love because they can hopefully see that I’m genuine, and really enjoy doing this regardless of whether it was on film or not, so that they keep coming back to see more of what fun I get up to. I definitely want to use it to have some amazing adventures that I would never have otherwise and do some crazy stuff, as well as travel. I already have plans to go out to Las Vegas in the next month and do something exciting that I would have never done if I wasn’t firstly in the lifestyle and secondly now creating content for my page. Hopefully that will be something for my fans to look forward to and that they will absolutely love once they get to see it. 💕
I want to thank HotBrunetteWife for taking the time to do this interview with us, as her schedule is busy enough as it is! It’s also cool to get to have such a deep genuine peek into what it looks like behind the scenes for a loving couple in the hotwife lifestyle.
Last but not least, be sure to support her future escapades by checking out her awesome content which you can find here: https://twitter.com/hotbrunettewife and subscribing to her Onlyfans: https://onlyfans.com/hotbrunettewife