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“After a few days of letting the experience sink in, I still could hardly believe it. I had not had sex with anyone but my husband for 20 years and yet here I was in a hotel room, fucking a stranger…and we had the video footage to prove it. The effect on our own sex life before and after was just incredible. We had opened Pandora’s box and we were hooked. No going back…"
That’s where left Tom & Louise off (click here for Part 1). So how in the world did they get from that hopeful and exciting spot to Tom experiencing the phenomenon of being “Overcucked”, an incredibly complicated emotional experience that he described in detail on Tumblr which garnered an incredible amount of notes? Let’s find out, shall we?
A Temporary Break In The Action
Perhaps it might seem a bit anticlimactic but truth of what really happened after their first encounter kind of was…well, anticlimactic. In fact, there was a period of six months when nothing more happened, at least regarding any hotwifing experiences. But this non-eventful period served a greater purpose for Tom & Louise—it allowed them both to process and determine where they both went on with it from there.
For better or for worse however, it wasn’t some serene period filled with nothing but deep soul searching and intimate connection. As Tom describes it, “Overridingly, it was just that everyday life just got in the way. Imagine a six month period where just about every majorly stressful life event all came one after the other, sometimes more than one particularly dreadful and similar one, almost at once, and I think you’ll be close. The fact that either of us, but arguably particularly me, mentally survived that six month period at all is something for which I am grateful but suffice it to say, it wasn’t pleasant.”
That’s life though, isn’t it? If you’re not prepared to weather regular storms and curve balls that come your way, then you might want to batten down the hatches if you’re considering exploring hotwifing without a solid relationship foundation. (That’s the polite way of saying you shouldn’t be exploring hotwifing together if you don’t have a solid intimacy bond already. Tom & Louise clearly did, which is why they weather the storms.)
They found their way back to exploring the lifestyle though. “By August, having been chatting to a guy for about two months, Louise was hopeful that she had found the guy who was to be her second. There had been a progressive build up in chatting to each other online and from the pictures they’d swapped it was apparent that there was a really strong mutual attraction. So together with me, she arranged a social meet with him.”
“Now J was quite new to it, had never experienced a couple and was quite honest about the fact that he wasn’t sure how he felt about me being present, at least in the same room for their first time. I guess I could understand that actually, and seeing how exited Lou was about meeting him, I was keen to facilitate that for her whatever that involved. (ok and to elaborate on that – by seeing I really mean witnessing… its not something guys can really comprehend until they experience it – but experiencing her wetness – for another man… and I’m talking extreme wetness… wetter than you have ever remembered her… and permanently… That, believe me, takes your breath away, it certainly did and does for me anyway).”
“So even at that social meet, it felt right to allow them to walk together on their own. We did all have a pint together after, but Lou agreed that I’d instinctively got the balance right. Over the next few days we discussed me being in the house but just staying out of the way, or touched on the option of it being the following week while I was away on business. Initially Louise wasn’t sure she felt safe about that, but over the next few days of chatting with him, and without any further influence on my part, that was the option she chose.”
“I was away from the Tuesday to the Saturday and it was due to happen on the Friday night. Originally I wasn’t going to get to watch. Lou would just tell me about it, but at the last minute we devised a way I could skype in. Lou would leave her laptop on the table as if she’d been working with some blue tack over the camera light… so in fact I would get a one way show. The prospect of that was thrilling.”
I wanted to take a moment to point out the steps they had taken leading up to all this. Louise and J had been chatting for two months, all three of them (Tom, Louise, & J) had met in person and gone out for a pint together, there was some deliberation between Tom & Louise, more chatting, and finally a plan was devised. They did this smart, together, in a step by step way, so even if it seems like it all unfolded rather fast, it in fact unfolded in a very safe, systematic way.