I got permission to share this pretty powerful story of a recent client of mine.
He and his wife were pretty involved in the cuckolding lifestyle for quite some time. This was until 2014 when they had to stop due to some serious health problems his wife had run into. Luckily, they were able to get those health problems resolved. But, his wife wasn’t the same after, physically or mentally.
This impacted their sex life, and they went on a very long hiatus regarding their cuckolding escapades.
As I’m sure every man who is reading this can imagine, it was a difficult transition to make for both of them. They had made cuckolding an integral part of their relationship together, and it worked for them. So to just have all that taken away with no end in sight…well, it’s not exactly an easy situation to deal with or accept.
The husband was having an especially hard time dealing with the halt in cuckolding, especially because his wife hadn’t ever officially put out that they were going to definitively abandon the lifestyle. This gave him a bit of hope that they would one day be able to relive their glory days.
So he tried to be supportive and understanding of his wife, and he also tried to get them back into the swing of things. But, no matter what he tried, it failed. She just wasn’t open to his attempts for one reason after another.
Things Took A Turn For The Worse
After awhile, the rejection started to get to him. This led him to feel pretty frustrated (whether you think he was right or wrong for feeling this way, his feelings were real), and this in turn led to him mishandling the situation. Here’s how he describes it:
“I told her I might as well go off and find a woman who will cuckold me if she won’t. I have made up stories of women at work being interested in cuckolding their husbands. I have instantly regretted saying these things. I put it down to my frustration needing to be expressed - needing to be let out somehow - so I attack what I see to be the cause of that frustration - my lovely wife. Utterly ridiculous and it is a characteristic of my personality I truly hate.”
On a side note, his willingness to not only be aware of but openly admit his mistakes is admirable.
Anyway, as you can imagine, things just got worse, culminating in them actually getting extremely close to ending their marriage.
Thankfully, they didn’t and chose to remain together. However, things weren’t exactly resolved on a core level. In order to try and solve the conflicts around cuckolding, the husband took a three month vow that he wouldn’t bring up his fantasy at all, and that’s where our story begins. Below are the screenshots of an email he sent me describing what happened after he completed the first month of his vow.
Sensitive and personal information has been redacted, and I’ve underscored some relevant parts in red.
“And She Flatly Stated No, Never…"
A Seemingly Hopeless Situation
So, at first glance, this situation might seem pretty hopeless. After all, she had said (or implied) the word “never” no less than 3 times and objected in numerous other ways, he had tried several different approaches, and in the end even he who knew his wife best felt the situation wasn’t going to be recoverable. And keep in mind all this is after the recent near marriage-ending blowout they had.
But his desire to live out the fantasy again was strong, and he honestly and genuinely believed it was good for their marriage together. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying his desires didn’t have any selfish components to them; what I’m saying is overall he was passionate about this for them and for their relationship.
He had enlisted my guidance in the form of a Basic Email Consulting Package though and I had created him a Personalized Cuckold/Hotwife Plan. As is the nature of women though, a wrench got thrown into the mix when his wife unexpectedly told him she wanted to have a talk with him about cuckolding, and warned him he was going to be disappointed.
He reached out to me to let me know, and I gave him a predictive analysis of what was most likely going to happen. I also provided him with what he should do leading up to the conversation, and how he should handle it (what he should say, etc). Below are the screenshots of an email he sent me after they had their conversation. Again, personal/sensitive information has been redacted.
The Turning Point
You can tell how much she cares for him and them, and although she obviously didn’t want him to leave, I have no doubt she had been attempting to mentally prepare herself for the possibility that he might and that she would have to accept it. But on a significant level, that was exactly the problem. Allow me to explain.
All along he had been pressuring her to do something that she had made clear she didn’t want to do. He pressured her to the point where he said he wouldn’t want to be with her if they couldn’t get back to cuckolding. As we saw, this only resulted in more conflict, and had he not been the one to bridge the gap and apologize, they would have most certainly have split up.
So in the midst of all the pressure she felt from him, she had lost touch with the part of herself that enjoyed all the cuckolding experiences they had together, and she lost touch with the part of her that enjoyed it as much as him. And because he wasn’t accepting of the situation or what she was going through and instead tried to resist it, it only stood to further root her in her position of not being willing to do it again—ever.
How he acted leading up to the conversation though, the connections they made together, and his execution of following through on how he should handle the conversation itself…all of that served to open up a part of his wife that she hadn’t connected with in a very long time. What did he do that was so “miraculous”?
He connected with her before the conversation, and for the first time in a long time, he genuinely listened to her and what she wanted to say. He didn’t argue; he didn’t fight it; he didn’t object or debate, no. He listened to her with an open mind and heart. We had discussed the possibility that the if there was going to be a chance that they got back into exploring cuckolding together, he would have to first stop resisting the fact that they hadn’t been.
In other words, he would have to accept the reality of his current situation, and show his wife the understanding and acceptance she needed to feel.
And that’s what he did by first listening to her and allowing her to speak. But that’s not all, as the screenshots point out.
He had to respond to her, and he did this from a place of love and acceptance. It was what he said and the place from which it came that melted her; it cut through all the resistance she had been putting up, and it allowed her to connect with deeper parts of herself and him that she hadn’t connected with in a very long time.
After all her resistance, and after all the conflict they experienced…she had changed her mind, and was clearly happy about it.
Learning To Feel Through The Resistance
It’s hard to see and feel through the resistance you can get from your wife when it comes to turning fantasies into reality. It’s also hard to know how to handle that resistance the right way.
But if you can accept it, and feel through it, and connect to that deeper part of your wife that she has inside (because trust me, just about every wife has that deeper part), her resistance will begin to melt and you’ll be astounded at what doors you’ll open.
This process and the guidance I provide clients with—it’s not about just accomplishing a goal by any means necessary; it’s not about tricking, manipulating, or using any other kind of negative means to help them get the “results” they want.
It’s about helping them enrich and enhance their relationship in the most intimate and passionate of ways. It’s about helping them strengthen their intimacy bond, connecting with each other, and navigating a new path which can be intimidating and scary and uncomfortable and foreign to most women, but not if they have the right kind of understanding, support, and encouragement from their husband.
And providing them with those things by using what I refer to as [emotional reasoning, emotional rationale, and emotional sequencing] isn’t an easy process, but it can be a simple one if you have the right guidance.
If you’re reading this because your wife already slept with someone else in the past but for whatever reason(s) she won’t do it again/anymore, then honestly your best bet is to go straight to a consulting package. That’s where I make you a Personalized Cuckold/Hotwife Plan™ . That plan will tell you exactly what to do and say (down to the word if you’d like) to get her back on board; it also comes with comprehensive follow-up help via email. All the consulting packages I offer can be found here: https://www.thecuckoldconsultant.com/cuckold-consulting-plans/
If you’re for whatever reason still skeptical, then you should really consider taking advantage of the current deal I’m offering on The Cuckold’s Compass Objection Guide. I’ve made the offer so tempting that you literally have nothing to lose…